Recently, I haven't had a whole lot of time to be actually 'working' on wedding stuff. I've had papers, and am about to have some finals. I hide my wedding stuff because school is dead to me, and if it is not hidden I can't help but to sit and stare at what I'd rather be doing. So working on school is a matter of force (and crying), and I would much rather do wedding and Christmas crafts. Unfortunately, that isn't what society thinks I need to do, so I cry.
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Today I want to talk about some observations I've made that seem to be the general state of mind everywhere in the wedding world....from the retailers selling something to you, to brides giving and seeking advice to each other.
When you read some of the message boards related to weddings (i.e. The Knot, WeddingBee, etc), you'll find many future brides pondering questions, ideas, and issues related to their upcoming weddings. In my time reading these various things about weddings, I've noticed one trend that is brought up in almost any situation, whether that involves conflict or not.
Self entitlement.
From people deciding what color their bridesmaids should wear to those who must turn the opinions of others into a dramatic ordeal that someone doesn't like them: there's still just one trend. Tell me, how many times have you heard something like this?
"It's my day, so they'll just have to get over it."
or
"It doesn't matter what color she doesn't want to wear, she should do it for you, it is your day."
While it is understandable for a bride-to-be to make plans regarding her wedding and generally have the final say, it doesn't mean we should back stab the rules by which we've lived the rest of our lives.
"Do unto others as you would have others do unto you."
The idea of entitlement seems to be one of the most prevalent attitudes I've seen in regard to weddings. As selfishness is to human nature as being is to being, there is no way we can prevent this mindset one-hundred percent. However, I think we should go into planning our weddings with a different attitude.
If we went into things remembering that this is just another day of you-and-him, but it is the ONLY day that you will have you-and-him, as well as all of your family and friends there just to see the both of you, I have a feeling our attitudes will change a bit. Without the support from any of these people who are there on your wedding day, it is likely you wouldn't even be with that almost-husband.
So instead of becoming defensive when someone has a suggestion about how to deal with something regarding the wedding day, I believe that as future brides we ought to try to remember to make a heart check and an attitude check. Whoever made the suggestion that maybe isn't agreeable is simply trying to help, and from the way they see things, whatever their suggestion is would make the day when you and your fiancé get hitched more meaningful.
What are your thoughts? Has anyone else noticed this trend of self entitlement regarding weddings that seems to be unchecked and deemed acceptable, or even rightful, within the wedding community?
