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Friday, July 13, 2012

Dating at a Distance


Long distance relationships (LDRs as they say in the online world) are not easy. While you can talk to that person, you are limited when it comes to actually doing things with them. Besides Pinterest Dates,Tyler and I came up with MANY different ways to spend time together while still being over six thousand miles apart.


Here are some of the dates we attempted…

Skype Movie Night: Skype has a screen sharing capability. This means one of you can see the other person’s screen instead of seeing the input from their webcam. If the person who is sharing their screen plays a movie on their computer, both can watch almost simultaneously. However, be aware the sound will be somewhat off sequence for the person on the other end. Tyler and I solved this problem by turning subtitles on, and accepting the out of sequence sound. If you haven’t seen a movie together for months, or want to watch something special, this is the way to do it together.
We watched this on our anniversary abroad, because we first held hands watching this movie. :)

The Question Game: each person takes turns asking questions to the other. The rule is you have to answer the question you ask as well, so if you aren't willing to answer, don't ask!

Go Through A Couple's Book: Tyler bought us the e-book called 1000 Questions for Couples for our anniversary we had to spend separated. It helped tremendously when we ran out of questions for the Question Game, and we have continued going through the book since then. Some questions are fun, some serious...some you wouldn't have thought of.

Night Night on Skype: One of my favorites was falling asleep (remember...time zone difference) with Skype on, but this wasn't something Tyler was into. He usually did his homework, and I would watch and talk until I fell asleep. Especially when you are both busy on opposite sides of the world with class and homework, sometimes this time was the only time left to spend time together.

Take Turns Planning an Online Date: We would sometimes play an online game, screen share and "go somewhere" on Google Earth, Pinterest, or plan future dates we could do for when we were together again.

Play a Game: I thought doing a "draw together" would be fun...where you can chat and draw pictures on the same tablet. We did this a few times. Your art doesn't have to be "good"...just as long as you have fun!
One of our Paint Dates

Tips For International Long Distance Relationships


Send Your "Person" Texts for Free: If you are the one who is outside your home country, you can send texts from your email for free. You just have to find that person's carrier's code...for exampe, if they use AT&T, the format should be 5555555555@txt.att.net (their number@txt.att.net). Other cell phone carriers will have similar codes, they are easy to look up online.

Send 'Love' Emails: We sent love e-mails to each other, especially when we knew the other person was having a rough week. (Snail mail to China is just too...snail-ish.)

Go "Out" Together: Sometimes we'd go out somewhere to get coffee or food to Skype instead of staying home. I always enjoyed when Tyler would study and have me on Skype at Starbucks. Even though we didn’t talk much, it was fun to hear the music and see the cars and people going by outside the window.

KaKao Talk: This didn't work for us because Tyler isn't an iPhone user, however if you have certain types of smart phones, look for the app called Kakao Talk. You may text and make international calls for free. It was so fun to talk to my Korean friends the other day, and to be able to do it with the convenience of my phone. The only catch is for whoever is overseas, if you do not use your data plan (who would??) then you have to use Wi-Fi to utilize the app (otherwise your data charges will put you in debt for the rest of your life!)

One blog that helped me SO much during our time apart was Loving From a Distance. There are tons of good ideas here that are good for making your Skype or Google Video Chats a little more fun.
Be careful, as there were also some ideas that do not fit within healthy boundaries for Christian dating couples, however, as with the rest of life, use your common sense and morals to judge what is and is not appropriate.

I hope this is helpful to anyone out there going through a period of time apart from "your person." I know without stumbling across some of the advice I found from others, we wouldn't have found as many fun ways to keep in touch. I thought I would share our experiences with continuing to grow deeper in our relationship while apart for a period of time.


With Love and a Cup of Coffee,

-Saxon

Check out my last post about Surviving a Long Distance Relationship here!

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